Echo of a kiss
by EnsignAbby
Summary: J/C What happens when time gives you a chance to change things? Chakotay finds out... Please R + R!


"Echo of a kiss" By Abby Rating: G Summary: J/C..Fix for "Shattered" What if it really didn't end that way? Notes:This is a first for me. Dedicated to Tammy, that J/C nut. :-D  
  
***  
  
The other odd crewmembers filtered out of engineering and back to their sections of the ship, preparing for the moment when the shards of time would be fitted back together, all memory of this occurence lost. Only the Captain and her Commander were left, taking in the quiet under the glow of the churning warp core. They wandered in the silence to the railings, not quite sure what to say at a moment like this. What would one say? It's been awkward, but you're never going to remember this, so this might as well be goodbye?  
  
Chakotay let his eyes sweep over the Captain Janeway he once knew. The one he first met. As of yet she was innocent, not knowing the hardships she would one day have to face. Her gaze danced across the soft blue light, watching the swirls of antimatter. In his time, she looked the same, never losing that youthful look, the only difference now being her auburn hair swept up into that bun that gave her such a professional, no-nonsense look.  
  
He knew however, that wrapped up in that style was waves of flowing hair that was not often less loose, let to breathe. He remembered with fondness how she wore it on New Earth, her ringlets catching the sunlight, how they always tempted him to touch them, yet he never dared to...  
  
The sound of her voice broke him out of his reverie. "Do you..." she said quietly, the hint of hesitation on her voice. "...mind if I ask you something?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"It's probably not my place to ask, but since pretty soon this will all be some forgotten memory, and during this entire adventure with you, something has been screaming to me from the back of my mind." She glanced up to him with questioning eyes.  
  
He sensed that what she wanted to ask most likely had to do with the future. He searched for some reason not to answer her questions, and found no reason not to. She was going to forget all this. Only HE would have to deal with it when he returned to the Voyager, the Kathryn that he knew. "I'm listening." He answered.  
  
She took the invitation and started slowly. "In your time, we're good friends, aren't we?"  
  
He knew where this was going. Was he willing to share it? "Yes, I'd like to say we are."  
  
She turned toward him, facing him head on, preparing herself, opening her mouth at first, but the words only dissolved on her tongue and she had to start again. "Are we ever...MORE...than friends?"  
  
Chakotay's face fell, even though he knew this was what she was going to ask. He thought over the times when he was sure that they were on the brink of changing, the moments of tension where both of them looked at the other, willing them to make the first move, and in the end denying themselves for numerous reasons. Reasons that not always made sense, reasons that sometimes left him frustrated, he pondered, but reasons notheless. He could now sense one of those moments. A moment that would go nowhere. "Let's just say," he started. "That there are some boundries that we never cross."  
  
Her crestfallen look told him that that answer wasn't was she was searching for. She looked down for a minute, trying to hide her expression, looking down at her hands, her outfit covered in magazines full of hyposprays and things. Her defeat was shortlived, though, and an idea caused her head to pop back up, her blue-grey eyes now filled with determination. "Do you want to?"  
  
The nature of the question surprised him, momentarily rendering him speechless. In this timelessness, was she going to set free these captain's rules, consider options? Knowing her, this probably had something to do with changing the timeline. She sometimes threw out the rules when her thoughts were running away with her. "What do you mean?"  
  
"Just answer the question." She gave a light laugh that slowly faded into seriousness.  
  
There was no way of avoiding this. "Well, Kathryn..." He looked at his boots, turned his attention to the blue whirpool to lose himself in thought for a second, then finally settled back on her. "I always hoped to. But someway or another you escape my grasp." He said, trying to sound cool and controlled while his emotions were churning inside him.  
  
She didn't reply, but somehow understood what was going on, measuring her own weaknesses, feeling sympathetic. She laid her hand on his resting on the railing, and gave it a squeeze. "I know it would be wrong to suggest we change that. And maybe you have hope yet..." He sensed a 'but', and there it came. "But... if it doesn't..." She reached forward and pulled him down to her level, startling him by laying her lips so softly on his own, inviting him to savor the moment, wrapping her arm around his neck to pull him closer. At first he wasn't sure what to do, but the feel of her lips against his own caused him to surrender to his pent up feelings, taking charge and deepening the kiss. When they parted, he looked upon her, seeing the serene look in her eyes. "That.." she whispered, "Is something to keep with you." She put on the lightest humor. "A parting gift, if you will." She smiled gently.  
  
He was flabberasted. He certainly wouldn't have expected this of her, couldn't even imagine a greater gift. He let out a deep breath that he didn't even know he was holding. "Thank you" His voice was low and sincere.  
  
He was given the pleasure of seeing her in a full smile, her set of beautiful white teeth shining. "Don't mention it. Do what you will with it." She said with a tone that was playful, yet carried so much weight in it. What was going on in her head, he would never know. She stood up and straightened her shoulders, taking on her captain stance again. "Well, I had better get back to my own time, my own bridge. It has been... interesting." She laughed. She gave him a quick salute and a smirk. "See you in the future." And before he could find anything to say, she had left.  
  
***  
  
She laughed at the expression on his face as she teased him about the temporal prime directive, looking at him over the rim of her cup as she took another long sip of the cider. She had been trying for the better part of a half hour to get him to break the silly directive and tell her what had happened during the mission that never really happened, a part of her life that was lost. Something interesting DID happen, however, she could tell by that knowing look of his. She would get it out of him eventually, even if she had to make him slightly more intoxicated than he already was. She sat up and leaned over to reach for the decanter. "More cider?" She asked non too subtly, hoping that he would get the hint that she meant business, satisfied when he burst out laughing.  
  
"You're really curious, aren't you?" he chuckled, taking the last swig in his glass before setting it down with a clink on the coffee table. She only replied by nodding and curling her legs up farther on the couch, preparing herself like a teenage girl waiting for gossip. He leaned forward, looking at her with his dark eyes, evalutating her, and she could tell something was simmering away in that head of his, not by his expression, but by the little nuances, little habits that she had grown accustomed to, using them to interpret his thoughts, like windows to his mind. He finally opened his mouth, and she found herself tilting toward him, halfway expecting what he was going to say to be whispered. "There is... ONE thing I could tell you."  
  
She became all the more eager. "Yes?" Came her breathless reply.  
  
He started to say something, halted, and just stared at her. She was about to question him when he completely took her off guard by pulling her to him, cradling her jaw in the palm of his hand, and kissing her tenderly. She knew at the back of her consciousness that she should have a problem with this, but her heart took over and lived in the now, cherishing his loving caress and the sweetness of his lips. Her eyelashes fluttered shut, and let him crush her against the back of the couch, winding her fingers in his raven hair. But the moment ended too soon, and to her dismay they had to come back up for air. She sighed heavily, wishing to herself that they didn't have to stop. She gazed up at him over her, his content look that was mirroring hers. Whatever happened to the boundaries between captain and commander? yelled that one side of her, the side she chose to ignore, the side that was now rapidly dying. "What was that for?" She breathed.  
  
He regarded her, seeing in her eyes what he had been searching for, seeing the sparkle of the Kathryn of all those years ago staring back at him. He had taken the opportunity, and now the reward was the awakening of her heart, that she was truly perceiving him in a whole new light, as if she had been dead to her emotions for seven years. He took a thumb and caressed her cheek, her hand coming up to cover his. "Consider that," He said with a voice quivering with the excitement of what was to come, "An echo of your past."  
  
@~~{~~FIN 


End file.
